"you think you know somebody"
I was thinking about this when an friend/acquaintance said it as they commented on breaking up with their significant other.
Then I thought - Really? How well do you really know someone? Think about Ann Rule being good friends with Ted Bundy - during his murdering years. Wow! Not that I am accusing anyone of being a sociopath - just saying. How would you know? I mean Hitler, Eichmann and bin Laden. Did their mothers look at them and go, 'Oh, my sweet little crazies!' ? Probably not.
What amazes me is that couples who marry quickly (as opposed to living together first) last longer. Why is that? Is it because they recognize going into the marriage that they don't know this person that well and that adjustments will have to be made? Conversely, do the couples who live together for years think, "Well, now I know this person. They won't change. There is nothing that I don't know about them now."
I think of people I have known for more than half of my life and there are definitely things that they don't know about me. There are things that I would rather they Didn't Know about me. (cobankruptcyugh)
No - you really don't know somebody. What's unfortunate is that we are so quick to say, "Oh, well, you are obviously not for me." It's almost like we look for reasons to dump someone or to say, "well, ... I don't want to 'settle.'" Settle? To that I say, "Take a look in the mirror, sweets, because we all have flaws and eccentricities that make us ... us."
(And, to clarify, I think guys get the worse end of the deal - they *never* know what a woman with PMS is really like until they marry one. Even then, during the "honeymoon stage" I think they are a bit shielded. suckers.)
I wish that in today's society we would take the time to get to know people. I am sure that I have had complete strangers come up and tell me I am "weird" or "loud" or whatever. And, really, do I have to tell them that I have a slight hearing loss (so I speak loudly) and that I have ADD (funny! I don't hear people calling Ty Pennington "weird") and so my mind jumps from topic to topic (as witnessed here?). No, I sure as heck don't - if something bothers you that bad - well, follow your mum's advice: "If you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all."
my conclusion to this is pretty simple: Friends are the colors in your world - the better you know someone the brighter and more vivid their color is - take time to get to know people. Know their stories and their hopes and their goals. Be their friends, that, at least, is something you (probably!) won't ever regret.
Besides, who knows? You'll probably shock the dirt out of someone else one day.
posted by meg @ 12:00 PM
1 Comments:
I agree with what you say here, Meg. You are an awesome writer and have great insights.
Do you remember Lacy from our nanny days? she is getting married.
She doesn't have your contact info to let you know. also once upon a time I sent out a email asking our old nanny friends if anyone had your new contact info and no one did but Bonnie (remember her) asked me to send it to her if I ever found it. but I never did, her email is the same if you want to send it to her.
Post a Comment
<< Home